Pro-choicers vehemently oppose any language that would grant the status of “human being” on an unborn child, regardless of gestation — four weeks or forty weeks, it doesn’t matter. Until there is no longer those few inches of mom’s flesh between child and the outside world, pro-choice advocates need that baby to be called “fetus.” It’s a slippery slope of legal jargon. Admitting that a baby who makes it to 20 weeks gestation and beyond (the medical definition of stillbirth) is an actual human being may, over time, lead to the legal definition of a fertilized egg as a human being as well — thus effectively illegalizing abortion. I read a pro-choicer’s comment today who said, “one problem: you can’t be born if you’re dead.” I imagine he was speaking metaphorically because, as a mother who went through 41 weeks of pregnancy and 23 hours of a labor, only to push out a dead son, I can assure you it is quite possible for a baby to be born after he dies. In fact, the physical process of labor and delivery — the unrelenting contractions, the uncontrollable shaking and increase in blood pressure, the utter exhaustion from pushing your baby through the birth canal, the tearing and ripping of your flesh — they are the same whether the baby is alive or dead. I have given birth twice: once to a dead baby and once to a living baby. It was the same process both times.

The pro-lifers are no better than their antagonists on this issue. Rather than sponsor this type of legislation out of a legitimate concern for grieving parents, they use it as a poorly veiled attempt to further their political agenda. They see our tragedy as a vehicle for changing the legal definition of a fetus, which would, of course, hasten their goal of illegalizing abortion. Pro-lifers are announcing Palin’s signing of this Alaska state bill into law as a “respect for the sanctity of life.” While I would never argue that my stillborn son, Nicolas, is undeserving of such a description, I can’t help but be irritated by the pro-life advocates’ choice of words — the same words they use to argue against abortion. Their announcement smacks of a political poke at pro-choice advocates, which makes their seeming support of grieving parents insincere at best.

Something as simple as a birth certificate for stillborn babies to recognize the fact that the mother still gave birth and her child was real, even if it is termed a “Certificate of Birth Resulting in Stillbirth” in an effort to pacify the temper-tantrum-throwing political left and right, should not be such a controversy. I mean, really, who but the grieving parent should care?

This fight has nothing to do with us. Take your political agenda somewhere else.

Related posts:

1. Global Alliance to Prevent Prematurity and Stillbirth (GAPPS)