Hanami Prints Blog: Learning to Live Without Our Children » infant loss

Mommies Enduring Neonatal Death: MEND

hanamipapa — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 19:49:35 +0000

M.E.N.D. (Mommies Enduring Neonatal Death) is a Christian, non-profit organization that reaches out to families who have suffered the loss of a baby through miscarriage, stillbirth, or early infant death…

MEND offers support groups and services both internationally and nationally. Based in Dallas/Ft.Worth Texas, MEND was founded by Rebekah Mitchell.

International Services Include:

Free Bi-weekly newsletter
Online support forum
And numerous resources provided through the MEND website.

Nation Services Include all the services listed above including:

Local chapter peer support groups (visit links for contact information and maps.)
- MEND Home – Dallas/Ft.Worth
- Arkansas – Northwest
- Georgia – Atlanta
- Kansas – Emporia
- Missouri – Springfield
- Oklahoma – Tulsa
- Texas – Houston, Hill Country, Texarkana

Please visit mend.org to see their resources, special events or to make a donation.

What do you enjoy most about MEND?

A Small Victory: Helping Newly Bereaved Parents Create Memories with their Children

hanamipapa — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 17:56:31 +0000

A Small Victory is a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization providing hospitals and other birth professionals with CARE (Compassionately Alleviating Regret Everyday) Packages which gently guide newly bereaved parents in creating memories with their children that will last a lifetime. Founded by Liz and Ethan Allen, A Small Victory also pledges to open their hearts and lend an ear to all who are in need of an understanding friend.

A Small Victory relies on generous contributions and devoted support from the community to continue the services they provide. It is their hope and dream, that their organization will be A Small Victory for bereaved parents everywhere by turning misfortune into memories.

Founded in 2006 A Small Victory has helped over 200 families spanning across 42 States, 3 Canadian Territories and the UK. It is wonderful to watch this great organization grow from year to year. The CARE (Compassionately Alleviating Regret Everyday) Packages are a much needed addition to the labor and delivery ward for parents who have experienced a loss.

Care (Compassionately Alleviating Regret Everyday) Packages

Certificate of Birth
Camera
Footprint Card
Hair Clipping Card
Journal
and much more…

Please visit A Small Victory’s Care Package page to get a complete list of items and a detailed description of each.

Useful Links:

A Small Victory is doing important work. I’ve lost count of how many families I’ve heard say, we wish we had something tangible to remember our baby by. Simply when in the whirlwind and shock of grief, you do not think about obtaining a keepsake. Fortunately for us one nurse asked if she could take pictures of our son–thankfully we have a few snapshots to remember him by.

Have you or anyone you know received A Small Victory’s Care Package? What do you think about their mission?

Faith’s Lodge: A Place Where Hope Grows

hanamipapa — Sat, 05 Dec 2009 00:56:18 +0000

Faith’s Lodge provides a place where parents and families facing the serious illness or death of a child can retreat to reflect on the past, renew strength for the present, and build hope for the future.

Faith’s Lodge is located on 80 acres of the lush north Wisconsin forest. With eight beautifully designed guest suites, each accommodating up-to six people, Faith’s Lodge is a wonderful place for bereaved families to reflect and heal. In addition to the serene surroundings and cozy accommodations, Faith’s Lodge also provides optional activities such as “professionally-led discussion groups, therapeutic arts and crafts and north woods adventures.”

In operation since July 2007, Faith’s Lodge has served over 300 families and is the only facility of its kind in the country. Operating as a 501(c)3 non-profit organization, Faith’s Lodge offers these wonderful services at a minimum donation of $25 per night. “However, no one will ever be turned away for financial reasons.”

Download the Faith’s Lodge brochure here.
Download the Faith’s Lodge brochure for professionals here.

Other Useful Links:

Nominate Faith’s Lodge for the Chase Community Giving Contest on Facebook!

I just found out about this organization today and the whole concept has blown me away! Our family would have benefited tremendously from this healing retreat. A safe place away from the world, quiet, serene and surrounded by nature would have done the heart and soul some serious good during those first few painful years.

So today I am passing this message onto any eyes and ears that will take note. Spread the word about Faith’s Lodge and help nominate them for the Chase Community Giving Contest on Facebook! Faith’s Lodge has a wonderful opportunity to win more than $1,000,000 through the Chase Community Giving Contest with the assistance of Facebook users.

For all of you Twitter types out there copy and paste this message “Join me in voting for Faith’s Lodge to win more than $1 million in the Chase
Giving contest! Visit http://bit.ly/A3DZw“

What do you think about Faith’s Lodge mission? Would you have benefited from their healing retreat? Leave your thoughts below.

Capturing a Short Life Documetary Film Trailer

hanamipapa — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 16:49:30 +0000

Capturing a Short Life is a beautiful documentary about families dealing with infant loss and how important it is to remember and celebrate all of the tiny lives lost so soon.

Originally airing in December 2008 in Canada, Capturing a Short Life is powerfully moving. Shows people who haven’t experienced a child loss why it is important to for us to remember and talk about our children. One father said it best in the trailer “we love to talk about her because she was a person.”

Having known first-hand the pain of losing a child so young, we started Hanami Prints to provide bereaved parents and families the smallest of comforts through meaningful and personal keepsakes. We understand how important it is to remember and know of few places to find quality and thoughtful items to mark our childrens’ short lives.

Useful Links:

Capturing a Short Life– if you missed the documentary you can purchase the DVD from their site.
Hanami Prints– Our products

What did you think of the trailer? Did you watch the documentary? How was it received friends, family and the media?

Faith’s Lodge: A Place Where Hope Grows

Grief Support After the Death of a Child: The Compassionate Friends

hanamipapa — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 18:21:30 +0000

The Compassionate Friends is a support group dedicated to help families following the death of a child of any age. Incorporated in 1978, The Compassionate friends began with a chaplain, Simon Stephens, and a set of grieving parents at a hospital in Warwhickshire, England. Chaplain Stephens realized that the support these grieving parents gave to each other was better than anything he could have provided.

Mission
The mission of The Compassionate Friends is to assist families toward the positive resolution of grief following the death of a child of any age and to provide information to help others be supportive…

With more than 600 meeting locations around the country, The Compassionate Friends deliver in building an emotional support group of grieving families whom all share in dealing with the devastating loss of a child. Meetings are not moderated by therapists but instead bereaved parents, siblings and grandparents in all stages of the grieving process.

I first heard about The Compassionate Friends through an old schoolmate who lost her son a few days after giving birth to him six years ago. To date, she is still very active in her local chapter assisting in fundraisers and community events. What I was most impressed by was that shortly after her son passed, she was taken to a meeting being held within the same hospital and was immediately embraced both physically and spiritually–the group sobbed together and let her know she was not alone. Crying together, my friend told me that she was so thankful that there was a group of people out there to help her walk the difficult path of grieving her son.

Useful Links:

Couple who lost six babies in five years in seventh heaven as healthy ‘little angel’ is born | Mail Online

hanamipapa — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 16:07:55 +0000

“A couple who suffered the devastating loss of six unborn babies in five years are celebrating after the safe arrival of their daughter Amy.

Julie and Phil Turnock had almost given up on their dream of having a child after having six miscarriages, including one baby that had to be delivered at 21 weeks.

But they decided to have a final attempt and are now planning their first Christmas with their new addition, who was born after a smooth labour weighing in at a healthy 7lb 10oz.

‘She’s a miracle baby and we are going to have a wonderful time over the festive season,’ said Julie, 36, as she nursed seven-week-old Amy at the family home in Matlock Bath, Derbyshire.

‘When we look at Amy it sometimes seems like a dreams and that she is not our little girl.

‘All the way through the pregnancy, although I tried to remain upbeat I couldn’t help thinking it wasn’t going to happen and that I would miscarry again.

‘Even when we’d got through major milestones, and when I went beyond 14 weeks which was around the time I lost my other babies, I still didn’t believe I would be a mother…’ ”

Read more

As a parent who has suffered the loss of one full term stillborn son and a miscarriage, I can’t even imagine nor think I could muster the strength to endure what these parents in Derbyshire have. The loss of two children has taken a tremendous toll on me mentally, physically and spiritually–let alone six babies in five years.

Questions:

Where do you find the strength to to try again after suffering a loss?
If you decided to try again what would keep you going?

Subsequent Pregnancy After a Loss Support (SPALS)

hanamipapa — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 19:43:26 +0000

Subsequent Pregnancy After a Loss Support (SPALS) is a closed email-based, community support group that has given thousands of grieving parents a safe and compassionate forum to connect and share experiences with others who know the depths of grieving a child and the fears associated with subsequent pregnancy. Whether you have experienced “the loss of a child due to miscarriage, selective termination, stillbirth, neonatal death, sudden infant death, or accidental death,” SPALS offers an extremely active and supportive community to those currently pregnant, trying to become pregnant, or contemplating trying again after loss.

How active and supportive?

Very! Within moments of my wife posting her first email to the group there was an outpouring of support from members all over the world letting her know that we were not alone. It has been over three years since that first email and I can tell you the momentum and strength of the group hasn’t slowed a bit.

Shortly after the passing of her first child, due to severe preeclampsia and HELLP Syndrome, Sarah Grimes Founded SPALS in December 1995. Sarah is still very much a part of SPALS and is one of two list administrators.

Sarah shares her experience “The Life and Death of Haven, our Beloved Daughter.”

Conclusion

SPALS is a wonderful support group that has been a tremendous resource. Its members have helped us through some of the darkest times. There are many support groups out there, but SPALS offers an atmosphere of intimacy and privacy that is very comforting and reassuring.

Useful Links:

SPALS Home – Subsequent Pregnancy After a Loss Support
SPALS Faq – Frequently asked questions
Join SPALS – Join SPALS now
Sarah Grimes – For general enquiries and history of SPALS

Do you have a story to share about SPALS? What would you tell our readers looking to join a support group? What support groups have you found most helpful?

Number of stillbirths a ‘national tragedy’, says charity – Times Online

hanamipapa — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 18:37:26 +0000

Here is a story I found today about an organization called Sands based in the UK who is calling on Scotland’s Government to ensure that stillbirths and neonatal deaths are recognized as a “major health issue and addressed as a matter of urgency and priority.”

Pressure on understaffed neonatal and maternity units and a lack of funding for research into stillbirth is contributing to the avoidable deaths of almost 500 babies a year, according to researchers.

In a report to be presented to the Scottish Parliament today, Sands, the stillbirth and neonatal death charity, claims that the lives of many babies could be saved by improved services and increased funding for research.

The charity says that despite the figure of 325 babies stillborn in Scotland in 2008 — one of the highest per capita in Europe — there is currently no research into understanding stillbirth issues underway, a situation that it described as a “national tragedy”.

The number of babies stillborn in Scotland is equal to four times the overall deaths from MRSA, twice the number of adults who are killed in car accidents and ten times the number of cot deaths.

Related Links

Number of stillbirths has fallen sharply

Sands has called on the Scottish government to ensure that stillbirths and neonatal deaths are recognised as a major health issue and addressed as a matter of urgency and priority.

Neal Long, chief executive of Sands, said: “Almost 500 babies dying every year in Scotland is a national tragedy. For too long these deaths have been ignored and yet here is compelling evidence to suggest that many babies’ lives could be saved with improved delivery of maternity services and increased funding for research.”

The report, Saving Babies’ Lives, reveals that Scotland has one of the highest perinatal mortality rates in Europe — that is, babies who are stillborn or die within the first seven days of life. Mortality is highest in urban areas with the worst social deprivation and poorest general health indicators.

The stillbirth rate is 1 in every 200 babies born in Scotland, a figure which has not changed significantly since the 1980s.

Over half of all stillbirths are unexplained, the majority of unexplained deaths occurring in low-risk pregnancies. The campaigners want midwifery and obstetric training to focus more attention on the possibility that things can go wrong in pregnancy and how to recognise signs of risk and minimise those risks.

The report provides evidence that although per capita funding of maternity services in Scotland is comparably better than for England and Wales, there are still staffing pressures in maternity units and antenatal clinics.

“There is increasing evidence that many deaths related to events in labour are potentially avoidable,” it states. “Quality Improvement Scotland’s recent audit of intrapartum deaths (babies dying during labour) revealed alarming failures of care: in 44 per cent of cases where the baby died there was evidence of ‘major sub-optimal care’, which may have contributed to the death.”

Of the 53,000 babies born in Scotland every year, around 8,000 — one in seven — are admitted to neonatal units. Scotland’s premature birth rate is higher than in England and Wales and is increasing. Yet while the pressure on units is increasing, Scottish neonatal units continue to be understaffed and overstretched resulting in unnecessary transfers of babies and the closure of units to new admissions.

Babies in Scotland, the report claims, are not guaranteed one-to-one nursing care in intensive care units and says Health Boards must commit to a long-term recruitment and training strategy for the whole neonatal workforce to achieve minimum standards of care for babies.

There is also failure to accurately identify and understand risk factors for stillbirth, which include obesity, smoking, social deprivation, teenage pregnancies and older mothers. All these factors are high and rising in Scotland.

Gillian Smith, of the Royal College of Midwives, said: “The RCM in Scotland welcomes this report and recognises that more work and research has to be carried out around the loss of these babies.

“We share concerns around the reorganisation of maternity services and would support Sands in their request to make sure that during these reorganisations we do not lose the valuable input not just from midwives who specialise in providing support to parents and families at this time but also for onsite facilities which help families come together and start the grieving process.”

Case study

Not once, but twice Marion Currie has experienced the devastation of losing a baby at an advanced stage of pregnancy. Her daughter, Lesley, was stillborn in 2002, and her son, John, in 2006.

Both pregnancies had apparently been proceeeding quite normally and she had no reason to worry. With better knowledge, she believes, it might have been possible to anticipate problems and her babies might have lived.

“With my son, it was believed to be placenta failure. With my daughter, the cause was unknown, but perhaps in both instances if simple tests had been available, and there was more knowledge, it might have been different, it’s difficult to say,” said Ms Currie, 47, from Musselburgh, who edits a newsletter for the charity Sands. She has two other healthy children aged 14 and 4.

“If you could just identify which pregnancies are high risk, but appear to be low risk, then I’m sure babies’ lives could be saved. We need more research.

“There is an expression that says a new mother is born with every child. When the child is born, the mother is born. When the child is lost, that mother is left. I have two living children but I am very much aware that two children are missing from my life.

“No children are interchangeable or replaceable and every child is an individual. There are Lesley and John-shaped holes that will never be filled. And of course life goes on, you have to care and nurture your living children, but the holes remain. ”

via timesonline.co.uk

Posted via web from hanamiprints’s posterous

The Gravity of Infant Loss

hanamipapa — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 18:06:14 +0000

“Pictures from a cemetery, featuring the headstones of over 50 little angels. A tribute to all children who are gone too soon, and especially to my boys, Jacob and Zachary.”

This is a beautiful tribute created by foreverloves74. The photography is fantastic and has inspired me to go out and take some of my own photographs. I love the different perspectives and how the story is told. If you enjoyed this video I invite you to visit foreverloves74 YouTube profile and leave a comment.

Are there any videos you would like to share or recommend? Feel free to leave them below.